Why does my brain feel like it has 47 tabs open?

If you keep walking into a room and forgetting why, lose the thread mid-sentence, or feel as though every practical detail is balanced on the edge of disappearing, it makes sense to wonder whether something is wrong with your memory.

The short answer: feeling more forgetful can be very real, even when standard cognitive testing does not show a broad memory deficit. That distinction is not a dismissal. It is a clue that the everyday experience of remembering is bigger than one test—or one explanation.

What researchers actually know

A 2022 study compared 43 first-time mothers at one year postpartum with 43 non-mothers. The mothers reported significantly worse subjective memory. Yet the groups did not differ significantly on tests of verbal memory, working memory, processing speed, or theory of mind.

In that study, poorer self-reported memory among mothers was associated with poorer sleep, anxiety, and depression measures. Because the study was observational, it cannot tell us that any of those factors caused the memory concerns—or that every mother will have the same experience.

Another small observational study of pregnant and postpartum women reported that postpartum status was associated with higher odds of scoring in the lowest quartile on processing speed and inductive reasoning. It did not show a broad memory deficit, explain why those differences appeared, or establish that they affect daily life. Together, these findings are mixed—not a verdict on mothers’ minds.

Memory isn’t one thing

Subjective memory is the lived feeling that your memory is less dependable. Objective cognitive performance is how someone does on a particular task in a particular setting. Attention is the ability to stay with what is in front of you. Prospective memory is remembering to do something later: send the form, refill the prescription, pick up the milk.

These can overlap, but they are not interchangeable. A lab task may be quiet and contained; a family day is rarely either. A person can do adequately on a standard task and still feel stretched thin by constant interruption, decisions, and remembering-for-everyone.

Why sleep may matter

In a small prospective study during the first three postpartum weeks, first-time mothers reported more awakenings and more time awake after going to bed than nonpostpartum women. Few overall differences appeared on cognitive tests, but sleep loss was related to mood and to performance on some memory and psychomotor measures. That makes sleep a plausible contributor to day-to-day slips—not proof of a universal or persistent postpartum cognitive decline.

A separate 2024 meta-analysis of adults—not postpartum participants—found that one restricted night of sleep increased sleepiness and impaired sustained attention, with slower reactions and more attentional lapses. It did not find broad effects on working memory after one short night. That matters because sleep may make attention less reliable without giving us permission to claim that night feeds or one bad night broadly damage memory.

Why mental overload can make remembering harder

A general review of prospective-memory research found that people were more likely to miss a delayed intention when demanding ongoing tasks taxed their cognitive resources. It was not a study of mothers or parenting responsibilities. But it offers a careful, plausible lens for the experience of trying to remember the permission slip while responding to a message, calming a child, planning dinner, and getting out the door.

In other words, some “memory” failures may begin earlier: at the moment attention is divided, or when the intention has nowhere stable to land. That is not a diagnosis and it is not a claim that mothers are uniquely impaired. It is simply a reminder that remembering to do something later is harder when the present is already crowded.

What the research does not tell us

These studies do not establish that motherhood universally causes an objective memory deficit. They do not tell us what is happening for any one mother, whether a pattern will last, or whether sleep, mood, caregiving demands, health, support, and context are interacting in a particular way. They also do not support claims that motherhood “rewires” or damages the brain so that women cannot remember.

What might help in everyday life

The point is not to optimise yourself into never forgetting. It may be more humane to reduce the number of things your mind must hold alone: externalise reminders into a shared calendar or a visible list; lower competing demands where you can; protect sleep opportunities when support makes that possible; and allow more recovery time than your old standards might have permitted. These are practical supports, not cures—and they will not be equally available to everyone.

When “mom brain” deserves more attention

Ordinary mental slips can be part of a demanding season. But new, severe, worsening, or functionally disruptive cognitive symptoms deserve medical assessment—particularly when they appear alongside depressed mood, anxiety, severe sleep loss, headache, neurologic symptoms, or safety concerns. Seeking care is not overreacting; it is making room for the whole picture.

Research and sources

Orchard et al. (2022), Evidence of Subjective, But Not Objective, Cognitive Deficit in New Mothers at 1-Year Postpartum — PubMed

Swain et al. (1997), A Prospective Study of Sleep, Mood, and Cognitive Function in Postpartum and Nonpostpartum Women — PubMed

Wüst et al. (2024), Impact of One Night of Sleep Restriction on Sleepiness and Cognitive Function — PubMed

Matos et al. (2020), How Does Performing Demanding Activities Influence Prospective Memory? — PubMed

Yee et al. (2017), Characterizing Literacy and Cognitive Function During Pregnancy and Postpartum — PubMed